I can’t believe last week I was in tears. Today I’ve had such an awesome day!
I woke up with my cat lying by my feet (per usual), although after 5 minutes, he came and rested on my arm (actually ON my arm), so I had to sneak myself out from under his weight. Oh how I love my kitty. He is the cutest, kindest and most gentle cat. I am so biased in thinking I am his favourite human but let’s admit it, he never runs away from me and he likes my room a lot! 😛
After breakfast I made a calendar for next month for my exchange student, writing in specific events for specific dates. This allows me to get a clear picture of what he has going on in his life while being with us, and also allows me to plan for any outings. I haven’t finished it yet, as I’d like to include mor outings. I did a bit of research on my city and what events are on over the course of th year, so it is all pretty interesting and exciting.
I then gave a harp lesson, to this girl I’ve become really good friends with. “Girl” but really she is a young woman, older than I am by 8 years. We get on really well! As there is a harp gathering in two weeks, today we just went through all the music for that. One of the pieces I wrote myself, so it was interesting for me to hear and see someone play something I composed. After the lesson we talked a bit about guys (as her parents were late picking her up). In fact throughout the week we usually email each other our latest guy problems (of which we have many, lol).
After the lesson I got the news that YYY couldn’t make it to the concert I had invited him to. As I had asked for two tickets, I wondered if perhaps I should ask XXX. But considering I am trying to get over him, I thought I would ask first my exchange student Cutie Pie, and if he can’t make it, then I’d ask my mum. Luckily, Cutie Pie’s camp was over and yay, he said he’d come to the concert! 😀
So I got ready and I picked him up at 3pm. We drove in to the city, found a place to park, and then walked to the building. We were in fact quite early. The concert was a choir singing mostly a capella music, although two pieces were accompanied. I think Cutie Pie liked most of it, although there was one work I could tell was boring him (but it was boring me, too, lol).
During the interval, I recognised this girl so I said hello to her, but then she was with a group of people, one of whom I recognised as this guy I had once been friends with, but we got in a fight last year and have not spoken since. Nevertheless, I said hi to him. So then everyone went downstairs for the cheese and crackers and drink, and Cutie Pie and I just stayed together.
Once the second half of the concert was over, we made our way back to the car. It was freezing and it was windy, but Cutie Pie wouldn’t put his jacket on, I had no idea why, although I kept trying to be mum-like, and repeating, with as much authority in my voice as I could, “Put your jacket on!!!” … but no, he didn’t. Then as I realised I hadn’t gotten a parking fine, I said, “Yes!!! I’m safe!!!” and two seconds later I hear Cutie Pie going, “I’m safe!! I’m safe!!” in a girlish voice, so I go, “are you mocking me?” and he’s like, “no! I’m just mimicking you!” and so it turns out he was mimicking me because I am nice or something. lol.
So then I drive him back to his home, and on the way I said or did something which sent him laughing, but like, he laughed for five minutes. He must think I’m quite a weird person! And then we were talking about the landscape and I said (in a serious voice), “back in the day, this used to be just …. desert …” and two second later I go, “well actually I’m not sure” and he just laughed. I’m so dumb!!! lol
Just before he got out of the car he high fived me so I guess so far we are on good terms. 🙂 He is starting school tomorrow morning so I’ll have to get up nice and early to see him off. Except he’s got no idea I’m going there to see him, ihihi, it’ll be a surprise for him, hopefully a nice one! Also I’m going to be a mum and tell him how I expect him to send me an SMS to let me know how his first day at school went!
Once Cutie Pie had gone home, I tried ringing XXX, but he didn’t pick up, so I messaged him to let him know I was coming, as we had agreed to have a talk tonight. So I arrived at his house and good thing is that it seems he was expecting me. He’s completely rearranged his room, it looks a little more spacious than before, probably because he has got rid of the keyboard. First we chit chatted about things like how his work is going etc etc. Then his mum came and said dinner was ready, so we went to have dinner. After dinner we went back in his room and I decided we might as well start the serious conversation. So I asked him about Monday and why it had happened that he hadn’t shown up to rehearsals, and that I had gotten very upset and angry. And from there on we talked about how each of us had been feeling, and I tried to open up about what I am going through with my family. He said that because I’d come unannounced at his place, in tears, the other day, all week long his parents have been mad at him and asking him lots of questions, so he didn’t appreciate me doing this. Ok, I will try to remember for next time.
He said that unless something is routine, it is hard for him to make it happen (i.e. a rehearsal). Therefore we have set a day and a time that suits us both for a rehearsal, to happen (hopefully) every week. I hope that we will lessen the stress for me and that this solution (which XXX seems to say is what works for him) is the sustainable one.
I left at 9.00pm, we hugged each other before I stepped out the door. Not a long hug this time … but a hug nonetheless. So I think it is fair to say we have both moved on from whatever shit we caused each other, and made each other go through; that we are still friends and still desire to play music together; and that hopefully things can go a little better from now on.
I wonder if I love him, and I wonder if he loves me. Coz I guess he was also pretty pissed off and hurt by what I did (apparently he got pretty upset when his mum told him I was upset). In fact I often wonder if repeatedly forgiving someone is a sign of love, or rather a sign of stupidity. Because forgiving someone is really giving them a new chance to hurt you. Any thoughts?
So there we are, last day of July, last day of the week – and what a great end it has been to both!!! 😀