I can be really pathetic and lame when I am in love with someone so here’s an example. I found this post online so I am going to go through the “9 signs you’ve found your soul mate” and apply it to my relationship with XXX.
1.You communicate without speaking.
No we don’t really finish each other’s sentences or call each other at the same time. We can be fine on our own so it’s not like we are dependent on each other.
However I do think we still communicate even when we don’t talk at all, which I find really cool and weird at the same time. We’ve had a few moments during which neither of us were speaking and yet it still felt like something was being said.
Yes I really think XXX responds to my emotional signals and I hope I do the same for him. He is one of the best listeners I know and why I consider him one of my best friends. And I guess by listener I mean that he responds to what I say. Like that time earlier this year I said I was feeling lonely and so he made a bit of time for me to watch a movie. Or when I started crying and he just told me to “come here” and he hugged me. Like seriously there were the 2 best responses ever, exactly what I had needed, both times :’)
2. You know in your gut that you’ve found the One.
Hmmmm I don’t particularly have this feeling with XXX actually. Maybe it’s got to do with the fact that I don’t 100% believe in “the One”? Maybe it’s also got to do with his depression. There has been a few occasions when I thought XXX wasn’t good enough for me but I think that was the depression being too strong ie. his “real” self (and real potential) wasn’t coming through. I am not sure about this.
What I do feel positive and confident about is that I won’t ever meet someone quite like him, and that our friendship is special, unique and amazing in so many different ways!
3. The physical chemistry is palpable.
HMMM YES?!!!! I STILL feel soooooooooooooooooooooo attracted to him. And the physical attraction has been there since the beginning. And although nothing happens anymore I do think there is something physical between us.
4. You’ve been totally comfortable around each other since day 1.
Well I wouldn’t say day 1 but I’d say what was really odd about us was that we were REALLY honest with each other since day 1. From admitting our struggles and LONELINESS (seriously who goes around saying they have no friends? We did …). And that WAS the first night we met that we said that to each other, so yeah, day 1. But a few weeks into knowing each other we were already getting pretty weird and comfortable. Oh yeah and the conversations about poop eventually came up too and I thought that was just the cherry on top. lol.
5. But the relationship isn’t all rainbows and butterflies. He or she challenges you like no one else can.
YES. And I think if you read some of my past blog posts (last year and earlier this year) you would know that would be true. We’ve never argued but there’s been plenty of times I felt hurt and mad. Again that mostly had to do with the depression. So that has challenged me quite a bit … having to forgive and move on and refocus on loving him and being a supportive friend. It takes a bit of courage sometimes! I’m sure he’s felt the same about me. I probably have hurt him too but he’s decided to be the bigger person, forgive me and remain my friend.
6. You may not see eye to eye on every little thing, but you’re on the same page where it really matters.
I guess so? We definitely had a different idea for the concert programme but overall we agreed on the music selection. LOL. 😛 Yeah we don’t always agree on everything but with most big issues we seem to have similar views and opinions. Oh yeah we have the same parenting ideas: making the kids play music and play with Legos, lol.
7. The relationship brings both partners a sense of inner calm.
Well that sort of contradicts point 5 doesn’t it?
When things are going well YES definitely. XXX’s company makes me feel very happy, safe, comfortable —- so, peaceful. Obviously when things aren’t going as well I can feel pain, anger and frustration. But that doesn’t happen so frequently anymore (yay).
8. You and your partner have separate identities, but you face the world as one.
Yes, sort of. We are definitely very separate – as I mentioned earlier we are very dependent, which I really like. But at the same time when we come together then it’s great, and fun, and amazing. And I think having gigs together sort of reflects that “facing the world as one” idea, because that’s really when we become a team, and we make a great team, too!!! 😀
9. You may have known each other for years, but you suddenly find yourselves ready for love at the same time.
Well that didn’t quite happen for us. We didn’t know each other until we met (duh, common sense, LOL). Also when we met we DIDN’T want love (neither of us). In fact when we met what we both really wanted was SUPPORT (especially emotional) and FRIENDSHIP. So we sort of met at the right time … i.e. we both had exactly the same needs when we met. So we became each other’s needs I guess?
I read somewhere else ages ago that soul mates may have been around each other plenty of times before but did not properly meet until both people were ready. Well I find it funny because XXX and I’s families live like really close (neighbouring suburbs) so maybe I’d walked or cycled past him when I was younger, lol! Also we were both in France in early 2016 … not just France but the same city!!! At around the same time!!! How weird is that? And of course we went to the same uni …. but did not meet until 6 months into the semester. And in fact we’d seen each other once but did not really talk, and only became friends a few months later.
I just found another post here and I’m actually surprised because out of the 16 signs there are about that I feel are true for XXX and I! Number 1 is sort of true, number 2 is true, 4?, 5?, 6? … 7 – the thing about dates!!! We share the same birth number! (9). Not only that but he was born in the 9nth month in 1989 whilst I was born in the 5th month in 1995. lol. Number 12, number 14 as well … I often write that it feels like XXX and I are together but we’ve never gone on a date. 15 yes in a way … 16 … can’t be sure at this stage can I!
lol so this is what I like to do on a Wednesday night (did not go volunteering today, we don’t know where the Somalian family lives anymore as they’ve changed house. I really miss the kids 😥 ). BTW I am NOT saying XXX is my soul mate. I just like the idea of it, hence I am exploring it.